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Seringkali saya takut untuk menulis. Takut tulisan saya tidak substansial. Tidak “crispy” dibaca. Takut biasa-biasa saja. Takut dibilang mengkopi pemikiran orang lain. Takut “ngawur” dan “ngalor ngidul nggak ada juntrungnya”, saking malasnya saya menilik sumber-sumber lain yang bisa menambah nilai konten. Takut apa yang saya tulis tidak bermanfaat, karena bukan manifestasi dari kesadaran saya akan tanggung jawab pada keluarga, bangsa, dan agama. Dan yang paling saya takutkan adalah, wujud penghinaan terhalus – saya takut tulisan saya tidak menarik untuk disentuh sama sekali.

Padahal, menulis bisa jadi satu-satunya kemampuan minimum saya yang bisa saya pergunakan untuk berseni, bahkan, untuk menggapai impian. Terkadang saya bermimpi menjadi seorang penguasa yang bisa membentuk suatu kaum sesuai keinginannya. Sayang sekali saya bukan siapa-siapa. Saya hanyalah mahasiswi berusia 19 – hampir 20 tahun, yang dengan jutaan mimpinya yang “ngawur” dan terkadang “absurd”, menginginkan perubahan ke arah yang menurut saya lebih baik.

Saya yakin saya tidak sendiri. Betapa banyak pemuda-pemudi di negeri ini yang saya yakin mampu memperbaiki bangsa ini, atau minimal mencerahkan sesamanya yang haus akan kesadaran, dengan menebar pandangan humanis mereka dalam sebuah tulisan.

Semakin yakin saya jadinya, bahwa kekuatan positif pemuda-pemudi bisa membawa perbaikan, lewat kegiatan menulis. Sebutlah Kartini, beliau adalah perempuan muda di masanya, yang meski harus menghadap Tuhan di usia 24 tahun, telah menjadi bukti dan inspirasi. Seperti kesetrum rasanya, membaca tulisan-tulisan yang ditulis oleh perempuan aristokrat bersahaja, yang saat itu tidak memiliki kebebasan dan kekuasaan, namun kekuatan tulisannya mampu menggugah nurani kemanusiaan siapapun yang membaca, bahkan hingga lebih dari seabad lamanya.

Kartini adalah sosok inspirasi sekaligus pembuka jalan bagi kaumnya. Empat tahun dipingit dalam penjara rumah sejak usia 12 tahun, yang kemudian keluar dari pingitan karena harus menurut permintaan orang tua untuk menikah – bandingkan dengan kondisi kita yang bebas dari penjajahan dan feodalisme, bebas menuntut ilmu, bebas dari pingitan, bebas menjalani hobi dan organisasi, bebas memasang target hidup sesuka hati.

Dengan usia Kartini yang singkat, Kartini sudah dikenang sebagai Pahlawan Nasional atas jasa-jasanya – bandingkan dengan kita yang sudah atau hampir berkepala dua, sudahkah kita berprestasi yang berguna bagi bangsa? Kalau belum, kapan? Dan bagaimana caranya?

Kartini benar-benar menggugah saya. Membangkitkan keberanian saya. Saya jadi sadar, saya belum menebar manfaat bagi bangsa. Kartini juga membuat saya kembali optimis, bahwa meskipun kita bukan penguasa, kita bisa menghimpun kekuatan untuk memperbaiki keadaan dengan menulis.

Mudah-mudahan dengan note ini, saya dan teman-teman bisa menghidupkan kembali semangat menulis yang pernah redup, atau malah melahirkan semangat yang belum pernah terbesit dalam pikiran kita, untuk menulis, yang biarpun terkadang absurd dan crazily imaginative, namun tetap bermanfaat dan menginspirasi.

=)

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I screamed out loud and hahaha… it was just embarrassing to realize now that I might have been heard by neighbors on the whole block LOL. My sisters and my mom were singing Happy Birthday to me (I guess they had no idea what to sing haha) while staring at the laptop. My dad was, as usual, just smiling and also staring at the laptop for such a while.

Bisa kubilang aku bahagia sekarang. Bahagia dan lega karena lulus UAN dan lulus tes penjaringan mahasiswa fakultas teknik untuk kedua kalinya. Alhamdulillah..

However, I am kind of pissed a bit that I couldn’t make it into FKUI.
Rasanya pencapaian ini masih setengah isi setengah kosong. Hajat yang sejak lama dipendam tidak terpenuhi. Rencana untuk belajar ilmu kedokteran di Harvard-nya Indonesia itu batal sudah.

Saat registrasi di UI beberapa hari yang lalu, aku melihat barisan para calon mahasiswa FKUI yang sedang mengantri. Begitu banyak jumlah mereka. Wajah-wajah mereka seperti wajah-wajah orang pada umumnya, dan mereka juga berinteraksi secara normal dengan orang lain. Ternyata mereka yang cerdas itu bukanlah alien maupun semacam nerdy-dorks, mereka sama seperti kita. Aku jadi bertanya-tanya dalam hati, kenapa aku nggak bisa jadi salah satu dari mereka? Padahal aku yakin aku bisa. Aku kan nggak bego-bego amat…

Melihat mereka berjalan dengan senyum bangganya, saat dipanggil maju ke depan oleh panitia pengarahan mahasiswa, muncul rasa sakit hati. Mungkin lebih sakit daripada melihat mantan pacar kamu yang baru putus, jalan dengan pacarnya yang baru. Akan tetapi, sakit hati ini lebih mengarah pada sikap diri sendiri di masa lalu…

Mungkin aku telah kurang ikhtiar. Mungkin aku kurang berdoa. Mungkin ini sudah dipilihkan Tuhan. Mungkin itu yang membedakan aku dengan mereka…

But there’s no use to regret.

Aku akan menjalani apa yang ada di hadapanku sekarang. Entah kenapa aku punya firasat bakalan lulus cum laude dari Teknik Industri UI, hahahaha… Yeah I’m just trying to be optimistic and I’m trying to “fall in love” with FTI. Dan yang terpenting dari segalanya, aku harus bisa menyumbangkan ilmu yang didapat dari FTI semaksimal mungkin untuk rakyat Indonesia nantinya.

Pesenku, siapapun yang mau masuk FKUI, bener-bener deh… jangan lewatkan masa kelas 12 dengan leha-leha walau sebentar. Anak FKUI itu belajarnya nggak nafas lho katanya. You get what I mean? And I will tell you, anyone can do it. Aku aja masih yakin kemarin seharusnya aku bisa, tapi karena memang lengah sedikit, jadi meleset sedikit juga dari cita-cita, hehehehe… Harus percaya diri ya, itu modal awal yang paling utama untuk meraih cita-cita sehebat apapun…
Kalau kita sudah punya kepercayaan diri, 50% dari cita-cita sudah terwujud…
Semangat, para calon dokter UI !

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Pukul 08.00 pagi, tepat saat kantor pos Depok I dibuka, aku sudah berdiri di depan gerbang berniat mengantar sepucuk surat untuk seorang teman di Jerman. Merasa bangga menjadi pelanggan pertama yang datang, tentu kukira sang kasir bagian kilat khusus akan melayaniku lebih dulu. Namun selang beberapa menit, beberapa ibu berdatangan membawa paket/surat mereka masing-masing dan dengan santainya berdiri di sampingku, bukannya di belakangku saat mengantri. Tangan-tangan mereka diulurkan sedekat-dekatnya dengan si Mbak kasir yang sedang menunggu loading komputernya, masing-masing dari mereka manggil-manggil si Mbak itu dulu-duluan minta dilayani, “Nih mbak, saya duluan Mbak..”
Et dah.....aku berteriak dalam hati... GUA NYANG DOLOAN TAUK!
Mbok kalau udah lebih tua, ya bersikap lebih dewasa, mencontohkan yang baik-baik... Ngantri kan nggak sulit..
Dan akhirnya aku menjadi orang ketiga yang dilayani oleh si Mbak kasir, bukan yang pertama, itupun setelah aku akhirnya dengan terpaksa ikutan bilang, “Nih mbak, saya yang duluan Mbak..”

Suatu siang saat pulang sekolah, aku menunggu angkot D110 dan S16 yang trayek keduanya melewati Gang Haji Jumin di Jalan Pramuka, shortcut favorit menuju komplekku kalau mau jalan kaki. Sebenernya aku bisa naik D03 yang angkotnya lebih sering lewat dan trayeknya melewati gerbang komplekku. Tapi jalan ke dalemnya jauh, mending lewat Gang Haji Jumin daripada panas-panasan jalan kaki atau ngeluarin kocek IDR 3000 untuk ojek kalau lewat depan komplek. Yaudah, alhamdulillah dapet deh angkot D110. Aku adalah satu-satunya penumpang di situ. Nggak khawatir sih, soalnya si Bapak supir mobilnya dihiasi dengan poster berbau relijius dan ada tasbih ngegantung di spionnya, dan beliau sendiri juga sudah tua dan pakai peci (lho, so what?). Selain itu, dia adalah satu dari sedikit supir D110 yang nyupirnya nggak ugal-ugalan. Maklum, biasanya supir S16 atau D110 suka ngebut kejar-kejaran setoran dengan sesama angkot bertrayek sama. Kedua angkot trayek ini memang suka untung-untungan, karena nggak selalu banyak orang Depok yang rumahnya atau tujuan perginya ke arah Cinere atau Pondok Labu.
Nah, baru 300 meteran angkot yang kunaiki berlalu, ternyata angkot yang kosong ini harus bersabar ngantri di kemacetan dekat lampu merah perlimaan Nusantara-Ps Lama-Sandra-Sawangan-Dalem. Aku yang sendirian di deket pintu bengong aja ngilangin stress nunggu. Lalu seorang bapak berumur 40 tahunan naik angkot. Dia duduk di tepat di sampingku. Aku yang masih asyik ngelamun nggak geser menjauh. Si bapak kemudian menggerepe ituannya dia dan aku mulai curiga. Jangan-jangan ini seperti yang pernah diceritakan oleh teman-temanku sebelumnya, bahwa mereka pernah melihat orang yang sexually odd di angkot dengan trayek berbeda. Akupun geser ke pojokan dan setelah kupastikan kudengar ia membuka seleting celananya akupun mengeluarkan sebuah buku dari tasku, randomly, dan karena yang terambil adalah buku cetak MTK, aku pura-pura konsen baca buku itu dan membaca rumus trigonometri dengan suara agak keras. Salting! Kecurigaan mulai memuncak dan berubah menjadi kegelisahan. Si bapak mulai menarik-ulur ituannya. What the fuck! Angkot pun berjalan setelah lampu merah berubah hijau. I swear I didn’t see his thing, tapi kupikir sebelum aku melihatnya atau ia mempertontonkannya, lebih baik aku turun dari angkot sial itu. Saat turun, tanpa sengaja kulihat ia menatapku sambil tersenyum dengan senyuman paling menjijikkan sedunia, dan kukatakan pada sang supir saat membayar, “Pak, ada orang aneh di angkot Bapak!” yang dibalas dengan manggut-manggut dan ekspresi datar.

Lelah setelah muter-muter Bogor bersama nenekku, pamanku dan temannya, suatu malam aku dan adikku diantar pulang ke Depok lewat tol Bogor. Nembus di Margonda, kamipun harus ekstra sabar bermacet-macet ria di jalan. Dari dulu tuh Margonda memang terkenal tempatnya sentra pemerintahan Depok sekaligus sentra perbelanjaan, sentra transportasi, sentra warung makan, sentra ngeceng dan karena itu maka jadilah Margonda sentra macet. Anyway, jadi, saat mobil kami sedang menunggu lampu merah depan Ramanda, aku tak sengaja membaca sebuah banner raksasa di antara spanduk-spanduk Caleg yang mewarnai Margonda; ukurannya melebihi banner konser artis papan atas Amrik, Rihanna, yang dipasang di jalan-jalan ibu kota beberapa waktu lalu. Isi banner bermodel Pak Walikota Depok H. Nurmahmudi Ismail itu adalah…. “KEMBALIKAN BUDAYA BANGSA DENGAN MAKAN MENGGUNAKAN TANGAN KANAN”. Di belakang Pak Walikota ada sedikitnya 8 foto pejabat pemerintah sedang makan menggunakan tangan kanan. Dan di bagian bawah banner ada tulisan kecil ‘pesan ini disampaikan dalam rangka memperingati Sumpah Pemuda dan Hari Pahlawan Nasional’. Oke….tapi apa hubungannya antara makan pakai tangan kanan dengan butir-butir Sumpah Pemuda dan para pahlawan nasional? Lagipula, pantes mana sih pesan ini disampaikan oleh Walikota atau oleh guru TK? I mean, masih banyak isu publik sederhana yang bisa diangkat oleh seorang Walikota bermasyarakat plural seperti beliau. Pesan yang ia sampaikan tidak salah, malah sangat benar, namun, apakah itu lebih tepat tempat, waktu dan sasaran dibandingkan jika ia berpesan tentang “Mari kita ciptakan surga di Kota Depok yang bersih dengan membuang sampah pada tempatnya” atau “Kembalikan sopan santun bangsa dengan budayakan mengantri” atau “Hargailah hak orang lain untuk nyaman berkendara dengan mematuhi aturan lalu lintas” apa kek… Jangan seperti ini, bahkan seorang siswi SMA saja sudah bisa menertawakan seorang Walikota Depok. Kalau sampai ada turis asing yang membaca banner ini, mau ditaruh di mana muka kita?

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These recent days have been such a challenge for me. The feeling of coming home after one year long staying in United States is an unexpected one. It is….strange. I already got used to with all the customs in United States, their daily talks, high school experience, family life, and their parties—beside all trivial differences such as the changing weather, the less-spicy-foods, the quick Internet connection, the currency, the metrics, and even the smell of the air. I felt like I was part of the system already. I had been living dynamically with all those life problems and I always had good friends to support me in States and now…I have to face this: suddenly being in Indonesia with my natural family and old friends, who somehow anticipate seeing my change after long time no see. Some of them may have high expectations, and the rest may have concerns. And all those curiosities are to be released at the first time they see me home; and everybody may choose to feel happy or disappointed when they see the change on me.

I remembered the first day I arrived in Indonesia which was only last week. My mom was not smiling cheerfully when she saw me, but instead, she complained about my make-up. She said it was too much. My sister, also asking me why I was wearing high heels unlike ever before. Another sister asked me too, why I wore my headscarf on so differently in style. The next few days when I visited my school, my friends said to me I looked so different. Fatter, darker, and this and that… and they complained about the outfits I was wearing too. They said it’s too American. When I called my grandparents, they asked me if I still wear my scarf on or not after being back from America. My neighbors also reacted the same way. And my father, he thought that I turned too liberal, which is not in favor with him (glad he doesn’t think that way anymore).

Sometimes this fact makes me feel funny; it is amazing how different Americans and Indonesians are. Indonesians in common, to me, have a more connected feeling between one and another. That’s why I was ready to tolerate if people who know me in Indonesia would react so much upon my visible change. Some of them may cry, either happily or sadly. Some of them may remain friends with me, or not. It is such a big deal for them to accept my possible changes. On the other hand, Americans take less care of this kind of thing. For example, if someone changes their hairstyle or their outfits everyday, people will just give frank compliments or comments and that’s it—it is considerably easier for Americans to accept a change or difference compared to Indonesians. No wonder, it is because Americans are living in a more diverse community than Indonesians’, which in a good way triggers them to get used to with tolerating differences, while Indonesians are much less still living in a world of conformity, compared to a super plural country like United States.

However, I kind of understand why many people had concerns on me when I got home. I mean, at the first place, it is reasonable for them to worry about me when I was away in States. Could you imagine a 17 years old Indonesian, Muslim girl, being placed in a city of Cleveland in the middle of, say, a number of 100.000 Americans? People must think that I would be surrounded by so many influences, either good or bad, they don’t know. Besides, the whole world knew already what kind of name America has. It is normal for my family and friends in Indonesia to worry about all the propagandas I would face. Another thing is that United States has a Western culture like the European countries in which is different in any way than Eastern culture Indonesia has been holding. And it obviously is not a hope for them to see me significantly westernized when I get home. Moreover, United States is way more secular compared to Indonesia. People here might worry if I would lose my faith in God and what not. Basically, there are just a lot of reasons why people might have concerns on having me staying in USA for a year.

Now that I’ve heard many people said I changed a lot in many ways—either good or bad—I still think that I am still myself one year ago, except not 100% the same. I am now more able to accept differences and I am fond of having friends who are different than me. I felt sorry for people who just see me from the outside and then judge me or think that I’m changed by the Americans. Well, maybe I am. And it’s not because I’m easily influenced, but it is because I learned a lot of good things from Americans. And I really appreciate my old friends here who don’t mind to accept me as the way I am, no matter how different I look or how different the way I think right now. I appreciate my friends who give me a chance to show them what beneficial things I brought home with me, instead of blindly judging at the first place. Overall, I love to be myself as what I am right now and I wish to share what I got from USA with my people here.

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In the breezing night wind of twenty-five degrees Celcius
Two hundred twenty millions of people, continue their life,
Or done with life

A countryside girl is chit-chatting in a hut
While packing the fried plaintains for lunch at farm tomorrow
An old lady is sucking and chewing the tobacco
While massaging her husband, keeping him convenient
And fighting against those aggressive, fat mosquitoes
A farmer is enjoying his jasmine tea while resting after-
The whole day she’s worked at rice field to harvest
Her husband has died, left her five children who all now-
Working on their homework between their tiredness-
Of helping their mother to harvest at farm after school
Some male farmers are gathering, talking about-
Profit-sharing of their little shop on the street’s corner
As their other income source
Clearly heard is a sound sequence of people at the mosque reciting Qur’an
Some young couples are dating under the moon
Singing some love songs, promising they will marry each other
Little babies are in serene sleep on the swinging baby bed

Far down the city, colorful lights decorate the streets
Honda, Yamaha, Toyota, KIA,
Opel, Nissan, Ford, Suzuki, are trapped on slow traffic
Those pavement retailers open their tents and took the space of pedestrians
The appetizing smell of fried rice, hot noodles, hot ginger ale, saucy chicken
Invites people to come by to each tent and pay good price for what they get
Street singers are coming over while they are eating
Beggars are ready to disappear
A loud noise of Bollywood movie playing on a middle class neighborhood
Oh, it is coming from that wedding party
A child is having a hard time concentrating on his Math homework-
Because of that ear-cracking sound
Far away on the city’s corner, not only criminals

But also opportunist people are doing what they wish
Some 3 guys are trying to steal a locked motorcycle
While another group is trying to break out an empty house
Prostitutes, who are partly transsexuals, are looking for their preys
Clubs and pubs are full of young executives
Karaoke, drinking, dancing, or far more than that
Young teenagers are hanging out at cafes after they finished-
Watching movies at cinema
Malls are crowded of glamorous-looking ladies and gents
With flavorful smell of perfumes hijacking every body’s nostril
While on the other hand, a fifty years old man who is standing infirmly-
In a crowded train, has to smell the flavor of sweating people’s armpits
With no other choice
There is only a feeble sound of people reciting Qur’an at mosque
People are too busy even for praying together
Some office hard workers are staying in their office overnight
With a Starbucks cup or Coke bottle on their desks
Housewives are watching TV serials and having some snacks
Or talking on the phone with fellow housewives for hours
A poor kid are focusing hard for their exam tomorrow-
He didn’t have time to study on the day since he had to work-
At the train or bus station, selling candies and cigarettes
In his mind, there is a will to buy a medicine for his mother
Who is now severely ill,
Who is waiting for her last breath to heal her son’s burden

In the breezing night wind of twenty-five degrees Celcius
Two hundred twenty millions of people, continue their life,
Or done with life

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Peter Krause
Mr. Harley
11 English Honors
2 May 2008 (English Project)

"It has been a very great pleasure to make your acquaintance"

I certainly have met a lot of great people in my life. I have met people that formed me with their wisdom, I met people that taught me tolerance and respect and I met people that go or went through their life with unbelievable energy and power. All those people made an impact on me. But living in a new culture abroad, I met a person that I will never forget in my life and that taught me so much about myself and about prejudices and that with her openness gave me the chance to do so. Kartika Nurhayati was exchange student with me in Shaker Heights, Ohio in 2007/2008. I first met her after we both arrived in August 2007, she from Jakarta, Indonesia and I from provincial Germany. When I first saw her I had an inner conflict, although I certainly would have never admitted it....... On the one hand I came to the United States to meet new people from different cultures and I certainly really wanted to do so. Kartika was also the only exchange student I met at the beginning that had already good English language skills and so the communication was easier to her than to others. She had gotten a full scholarship as I had and all those things should have made me very close to her from the beginning on. But there was something different. She was the first Muslim wearing a headscarf I met. I had seen them before on TV and even some on the streets. But I had never talked to one. And yes, in the back of my head I had prejudices. When we got our schedules we found out that we had 3 classes together and so I would see her every day. And so being exchange students and having lots of similar experiences we talked to each other a lot. She was very open about herself, about her culture and she openly practiced her religion. She got to know so many people from the beginning on and I was stunned how she did that. Obviously she faced prejudices being the only kid with a headscarf in the school and it I was so impressed how quickly she moved people to see her as Kartika instead of “the kid with the headscarf”. Evenly quickly she had moved me. We were talking hours on the phone laughing and chatting, we were hanging out and we shared problems, like the question “How to find a Prom date”, together. She became such a great help in many situations and she changed my point of view in so many things. Thank her I truly and not just in theory understand to respect and tolerate the Muslim faith and her culture. She so openly shared her ideals about life with me and we found so many similarities between us. Her goals for her life like getting to college and get a high level job in a developing are what I understand as future. And it showed me so clearly how modern religion, especially Islam, and followers of that faith can be. I was so impressed by her work ethic and I oftentimes wished more people in my culture would work so straight for their goals and I myself would like to be as focused as she is and still have so much fun in life. All in all she greatly opened my eyes in so many ways and she became a great friend I’m going to miss when I am back in Germany. And I can say, it has been a great pleasure to make her acquaintance.

Oh my God....... This is very touching.... Rasanya terharu sekali hati ini membacanya. Kok bisa-bisanya Peter yang super gokil itu menulis seindah ini? (Biasanya dia kan kalo ngomong ngeledek mulu bawaannya...) Tapi jujur dalam hati, this confession makes me stand more firmly to let the world knows that I am a Muslim. How beautiful it is... that an atheist German like him think about me this way... Now I can say too, that it has been a great pleasure to make his acquaintance.

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Just because I'm a Muslim
Doesn't mean I'm one of those Arabs
Doesn't mean I'm fanatic, radical, conservative, moderate, liberal
or whatever things you would label on me

Just because I'm a Muslim
Doesn't mean I'm not sociable
Doesn't mean I think I'm always right,
Or you're always wrong
I do not, and I will never think that all non-Muslims are sinners

Just because I'm a Muslim
Doesn't mean I'm a terrorist
Doesn't mean I'm violent or abusive
Doesn't mean I'm not negotiable, or do not want peace on earth

Just because I'm a Muslim woman, wearing a headscarf
Doesn't mean I'm forced to wear this piece of fabric on my head
Doesn't mean I'm physically, socially, or economically abused
Doesn't mean I cannot express myself freely

Just because I'm a Muslim....

Don't stereotype me.

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This is WHAT MY FRIENDS here SAID about me:

Rebecca says, "Tikanur, Kak Nur, Karutika, Hi Nur! Can I borrow your shirt/sleeves? I looove your closet."

She also says, "Ah, you are such a drama queen."

Fai always says, "Hi KRAtika I miss you, long time no see, we shud go hang out!" ((She always mispronounce my name))

And she says, "I am sorry I am late... you are my best friend."

Peter said, "For English project, I made an essay about you. Why? Don't you realize that people are glad to make an acquaintance with you?"

Peter also said, "You gimme better understanding about Islam."

He sometimes teases me, "Stop making fun of me! Ok, you're soo good in acting. You should be an actress...hahaha..."

He asks, "Do you wanna skip the class with me? Oh NO, we should not skip again...."

He says A LOT, "Hey, stupid......!"

(And I reply, " Just because I am stupid, does not mean you have to be stupid too, hahaha..")

Or, I just said, "Danke. Frohe Ostern. Ruf die Polizei!" (Thanks. Happy Easter. Call the police!)

He said, "Hahaha I can't describe how funny you are...."

Jonathan always says, "Kartika, you are crrrrazy, gurl.."

And he always teases me, "Hey remember, you cannot have sex and drink alcohol until you're 40, hahaha..."

(And I reply him back, "Jonathan, who wants to wait for me to have sex til I'm 40??")

And he also says, "Ooooh You skipped the class.. you are in trouble!"

(He skipped together with Peter and me actually...... to get sandwich at Subway, hahahha....)

He said, "Nurhayati, gimme your Chipotle. Come on, let's go to Chipotle..! I am hungry.."

Surya said, "Do you wanna try my mascara? Oh my God, you look so pretty now...! Can I come over to your house......? I wanna do your hair too!"

Akilah said, "Your nickname should be 'Smilies'..."

Asuka said, "I wanto to gooooo.... shoppinggo."

Amadou said, "Would you go with a junior? Cause I'd love to go.... (to prom with you)"

Su said, "I swear to God, if you're not going with me, you're not my friend anymore."

Abby said, "You are soooooo silly."

Letonia says, "Hahahaha Kartika you're so funny.."

Dani said, "Why you always look so cute and innocent?"

Mme Wright said, "Kartika!! Be quite! You were so studious in first semester, now you are so uncontrollable!"

Zulaikha said, "Why you always willing to try everything... you're in Band, you're in SGORR, you're in Asian Studies, and now you're in Softball.. I wanna be like you."

Meredith said, "Your dresses are pretty everyday..."

Sam said, "I dont wanna make you pay for me....."

Harper & Christine asked, "Are you going to Asian Studies class tonight? Oh c'mooon, we love you."

Max says, "iyfvec bwehfvn gcew;cfjntcpergmpfienfcoomdmxjwoskdjnnfmcx ," (Hahaha I dont know what he's talking about.... he teases me in Yiddish)

Romero said, "No, I'll miss you the most when you're back to Indonesia.."

And he said, "You are my best friend..."

Mayank always says, "Hahahaha... you are hillarious Kartika... how do you type that Hindi really well...?" (In fact, I just did "copy-paste" haha)

I know this is random.. but wow.. writing down their quotes are fun.. =D

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Mas Ethan tersayang,

Aku kangeen banget sama kamu. Sudah satu minggu kita berpisah. Rasanya berat sekali menanggung beban rindu ini. Ah.. aku jadi merasa menyesal.. karena saat itu, aku pergi meninggalkan rumahmu tanpa kausadari. Aku tahu, pasti kamu merasa kesepian saat kutinggal. Maafkan aku ya sayang.. tapi memang saat itu, aku harus pergi. Kepergianku itu, bukanlah keinginanku. Seandainya aku bisa memilih, aku akan memilih untuk tetap tinggal bersamamu, sehingga aku bisa memeluk dan mengecupmu setiap pagi dan malam. Dan kita akan menghabiskan saat-saat indah bersama..

My lil hot man,
Kamu kangen sama aku nggak? Aku di sini terlalu merindukanmu. Sampai-sampai, tak bisa kupalingkan ...mataku dari menatap foto-fotomu. Foto-foto kita bersama dulu.. yang penuh tawa canda keriangan serta kebahagiaan. Kalau aku boleh meminta pada Tuhan, aku akan berdo'a semoga masa-masa itu bisa terulang kembali. Masa-masa di mana kau ajarkan aku, to be happy for no reason. Betapa memukaunya engkau ketika senyum dan tawa itu terpulas di bibir mungilmu, walaupun masalah di luar kian menghadang...



Mas Ethan Indra sayangku,

Kamu itu ya, selaluuu aja sibuk dengan sesuatu. Pagi-pagi kau bangunkan aku dan memanggilku "Nunuuu..." dengan pelukan penuh cinta. Kita bercanda-tawa sesaat, habis itu kamu berangkat menimba ilmu. Selepas kau pulang, kau akan datang ke kamarku lagi dan menyebut namaku "Nunuuu..." dengan suaramu yang khas. Kau akan mengajakku bernyanyi dan menonton movie bersama. Setiap kali kau sebut, "Nunu, Sita," aku tahu apa yang kau mau. Seperti biasanya, kau akan meraih tanganku dan mengajakku menonton Sendratari Ramayana favoritmu itu, yang tak henti-hentinya kau tonton berulang-ulang. Bosan aku.

Tapi setiap saat aku mulai merasa bosan, kau akan menari layaknya sang Sita dan membuatku tertawa. Kamu juga macho sekali, selalu sibuk mengupil dan sering kentut. Tapi wajah kamu itu lho, tetep aja innocent. Iih kamu memang lucuuu sekali..



My hottie,

Kapan ya aku bisa ke sana lagi? Aku benar-benar merasa bersalah sudah meninggalkanmu. Ibumu bilang, kau masih suka mencari-cariku, menyebut namaku, dan menatap foto kitat bersama. Semakin kutahu betapa merasa kehilangannya kamu, aku merasa semakin kehilangan juga. Aku berharap, bulan Juni ini aku sudah punya cukup penghasilan untuk bisa terbang ke sana lagi. Nanti kita akan jalan-jalan, shopping, ke pantai, naik perahu mengarungi teluk, dan aku akan menyuapimu lagi setiap kali kamu makan.. nyam nyam nyam. Mudah-mudahan ya sayang..... doakan aku ya semoga di sini selalu bisa have fun setiap saat, layaknya dirimu...



Love,

Your big cousin...

Nunu

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Nobody would deny that their exchange year has meant a lot upon their life. Neither would I. This is not a hyperbole, nor a lie. I would even say that my exchange year has “brain-washed” me in a good way. This is my story…

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Bingung aku..
Di Prom nanti, aku mesti pergi sama siapa?
Andai saja aku bisa pergi sama temen-temen cewek. Tapi ini masalahnya bukan homecoming atau pesta dansa biasa... yang biasanya aku perginya sama temen-temen cewek.

Ini adalah PROM. Ini adalah upacara kelulusan siswa-siswi versi Amerika. Kalau Smansa punya acara perpisahan kelas 3 di Hotel Bumi Wiyata, Prom hakikatnya sama aja kayak perpi kelas 3 itu. Semua orang harus berpakaian resmi dan rapi serta anggun. Kalau di Indonesia kita-kita yang cewek pakai kebaya, di sini siswi-siswinya pakai gaun. Ya pada intinya sama saja.

However, tetep aja ada bedanya. Di Prom, normalnya para siswa dan siswi datang ke sana dengan berpasang-pasangan. Tentu saja pasangannya mesti cewek-cowok, bukan cowok-cowok atau cewek-cewek. Jadi otomatis aku mesti nyari cowok untuk jadi pasanganku nanti di Prom. Nah itu dia masalahnya. Siapa yang mesti kujadikan 'pangeranku' nanti?

Okay. That's not a big deal. Aku masih bisa bemuka tembok untuk menyelesaikan masalah itu. Yang lebih aku bingungin adalah gaun apa yang nanti akan kupakai? Waktu Thanksgiving lalu, aku jalan-jalan sama Host Mom ku ke mall dan di sana lagi ada obral gaun-gaun Prom. Hampir semuanya open shoulder gitu. So I have no idea what to wear on my Prom. Mungkin aku akan pakai baju adat Bali aja kali ya. Atau kebaya. Ya kalau nggak, aku mungkin akan jahit-jahit sendiri baju Promku. Yang penting, aku mau gaunku tetep sopan dan mencerminkan seorang muslimah.

Prom memang masih Juni nanti. Tapi badai krisisnya udah terasa saat ini.

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As we've already known..
Soeharto has just passed away..

I'm just wondering..
many people used to dislike him a lot because of his wrongdoings to this nation..

But now, today, in this time, many people are grieving for him..

I believe, that's how human nature works. Whoever dies, except he/she is the worst & destructive person in the world, people will find the best side of him/her.
And they will grieve for the death..

Inna lillahi wa inna ilaihi rojiun

Let's pray for Soeharto. May God forgive his mistakes and weaknesses,
and place him in the best place beside Him.

Amin.

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